I've got you, I've got you

It's good to be in love, and that is really just so true.

It has been beautiful out

Sweater weather; my favorite.

Everything just feels too good, half the time I expect my house of cards to just tumble over

But it hasn't...

...(yet)

And honestly I hope it doesn't. I am no longer haunted by the ghosts of what I could have been or who I could have been with. I feel light and occasionally, simple. Laughing comes easy and despite the ever changing status of my home life, I've got you. And at times I feel weird or guilty for putting all this weight on you or into us rather, but it makes no difference. I have finally escaped my own thoughts, I can go to sleep and not hear a thousand little thoughts hovering above me. This weekend is going to be so nice, I can't wait to go hiking with you and your friends tomorrow. I just want to stay outside in this weather for as long as possible.

I'm drifting way too far, my arms, my legs are too tired

I can't sleep anymore, my head is in a million places. I can't keep up with my own thoughts and I am trying to do everything right. But, I'm forgetful and I have selective listening. I really am trying I promise and this weekend I am excited to drive with my best friend across state lines and stay in someone else's house, to go on someone else's schedule and just close my eyes and forget. I have this idea that if I go there it will be just like summer, and maybe that's just me being too hopeful. When I roll over at four am to see that I have missed calls from you I always feel guilty, because I know you are there two hours away feeling exactly what I'm feeling, just wishing there was more than a dial tone on the other line.